Pen's Tumblings

softserved replied to your post: Warning, don’t look if you are going to be upset, I couldn’t watch more than a few minutes.

I feel like there are always chances of these places being corrupt but being clingy and always scared for your children all the time can be unhealthy for them too. I’m sure it’s difficult to find just the right balance and close to impossible.

I am neither clingy nor scared. I am however a parent and an educated person who has the care and responsibility for someone who will never be able to care for themselves. Ever. Not even one day.

My daughter can barely feed herself, it depends on the type of food and on someone cutting it in to little pieces, or finger foods. My child cannot go to the bathroom, she cannot speak more than about ten words.

My daughter can be aggressive. She can and often is stubborn and wilful. Some of that can be handled with patience, determination, consistent reaction, or lack thereof and more patience.

If and when I leave her somewhere, whether it is for a few hours or overnight or longer I NEED to know that place is safe and that the staff are trained, capable, patient and have clear strategies for caring for her and who ever else might be with her.

I need to know this in advance because I am NEVER going to knowingly send my child somewhere where she is going to be abused.

Tomorrow night, as long as nothing goes wrong in the meantime, 12 will go to respite. No matter what ups and downs we have had with the service, that has been to do with the timings, never the staff. They are good, decent people who are trained and supervised by experienced staff and they think the world of 12. If it was any different she wouldn’t go. That’s it.

Nothing to do with clingy or scared, to do with taking due care of this young woman for whom her father and I have ultimate responsibility.

Corrupt is one thing, corrupt might be taking a backhander or turning a blind eye. Criminal abuse is dragging people around, egging them to commit suicide, letting them freeze outside in winter physically abusing them.

Yes, it is extreme, pray it doesn’t happen often but when you have someone, child, parent, spouse, who needs residential care it is one of those things that causes you concern.

It does taint an entire profession who don’t deserve it IF they are doing their jobs correctly. People who look after those who need care and do it properly do important work and it is demanding. They don’t need this stain on their profession but most importantly vulnerable people do not deserve to be abused. As their carers we have to know in order to make informed choices.